My Worst Nightmare

Sunday night I was riding bikes with my son when he got off his bike and said his tummy hurt.
6 hours later we were in an ambulance on the way to the Stollery in Edmonton. Turns out his appendix was about to rupture. Everything turned out OK, he is home now and he just has to recover.

Here is my nightmare. I am afraid of sick kids. I cant deal with it, it breaks my heart a thousand times over. I donate to the Stollery on regular basis but I cant bear to listen to the radiothons, the stories, and commercials let alone go there.

Little people should not suffer big people illness.

When the doctor at the Stony Plain Emergency said he was sending us to the Stollery, I felt a surge of panic and anxiety. How was I going to hold it together?
My son was looking at me , I looked back at him and told him everything was going to be alright, we were going to a hospital that knows how to take care of kids the best.
When he fell asleep, I buried my face and wept.

We were there for four days but it was the first 24 hours, I had to dig deeper that I ever have before. I knew my son would be alright but I had to be there for him as a source of safety and reassurance.
Walking the floors of the Stollery was incredible. Probably the toughest time for me was the common play area where many of the kids would gather in the afternoon.
I managed to deal with my sadness and anxiety and forced the best poker face I had for Raymond's sake but I cant help but think about the kids that we left behind there. I really hope for them.

This was truly a test in emotional control.

JC Masterson, Silent River Kung Fu, Alberta, Canada

Sparring and Control

How do we know when we have complete control?

It is very subjective and can be perceived differently by others. Watching two people spar is a task in interpretation. Who made the best shot, the first shot, within range, who has a strategy, who is merely reacting and who has control?

As a student you have to determine if you have control of yourself. If you maintain control of yourself you systematically take away your opponents own self control.

How does one determine this?

I came across a description of control as an “option of compassion”.

Let me explain why I agree with it.

To follow the path of the martial artist, many hours are put into practicing the basics of centering ones self to gain control of your actions. The martial artist will then move on to practicing applications and techniques with a training partner.

Practice gives you the ability to react but it takes mastery to include control of the reaction.

This is the ability to apply a technique with a degree of control that allows you the

“ option of compassion”.

Meaning, I can either seriously hurt this attacker or I can choose to apply just enough pressure to ensure my training partner knows I have positively executed a strike or break without causing them pain or injury.

This level of control happens by choice not by chance. This is the control as a martial artist that we strive for through practice and feedback from our fellow training partners.
This is why it is so important to maintain a healthy training relationship with your peers.
The more variety and exposure the closer the goal of Control becomes.

JC Masterson, Silent River Kung Fu, Alberta, Canada

Thoughts on a Friday Afternoon

I used to think Focus and Self-Confidence were unrelated.
As I watch students, my son and discover my own flaws and issues the two are parallel in my view.
If you find yourself failing at something it requires Focus to dig deep and discover what you need to change. If self-confidence is lacking it becomes a distraction.
A lack of self confidence will tell you "you will fail before you even try" or worse a lack of self confidence will tell you " I can't".
When Focus brings improvement it nurtures your self confidence then the two build on one another.
There is no better motivator then improvement.
Improvement equals results and results drive a person forward.
So, I say to myself "I can" there is no self doubt, now there is only time to focus and improve.

Brought to you by , Thoughts on a Friday afternoon.

JC Masterson, Silent River Kung Fu, Alberta, Canada

65.8%

I haven't been sick for a while, but I definitely caught something. Ear,throat thingy. It hasn't stopped me in my tracks but it has taken the drive and ambition out of me.
I hate being sick, no time for it.
Ironically, its time that fixes it.
OK, I'm done complaining, I just hate running at 65.8%.

JC Masterson, Silent River Kung Fu, Alberta, Canada

To Vote is to be Canadian

It may not have turned out the way you wanted or maybe it did, but one thing is clear...the Canadian people can still exercise their voting ability to make a statement.

I think a statement was made, by the Canadians who took their voting right seriously.
Change can be made in the government. Politicians will be held accountable, and I for one want to see some work carried out by the political leaders. Show me what you propose for this country is going to work. Give me the background , give me the reasons, give me something more than just broad platforms and proposals. 
 Government now has the foundation to start turning the wheels without blaming internal strive within the house from roadblocking everything, yet they still have a healthy opposition and hopefully the new circumstance will allow for professional debate with the countries best interest at heart.

Boy, did I wake up the "Optimist" this morning!

JC Masterson, Silent River Kung Fu, Alberta, Canada

No title, just sad.

I had a great holiday in Maui, I would go back in a heartbeat.


So back to reality, 208 emails, voicemails, deadlines and mysterious files waiting for me at work, laundry stacked up, my training schedule is way off the rails, no babysitters this week, Lacrosse games and doc appointment to get Raymond to and finally an Easter dinner to prepare. Wow, that doesn’t seem fair.


Then a terrible tragedy happened yesterday morning on the way to work. I take the bus into the downtown core and the driver was telling us about having to make detour.
You see, another bus had possibly hit a pedestrian, she told us. Once, I got up to the 11th floor of our office, it was quite clear below our building something bad had happened.
The police had everything blocked off and the bus sat grimly in the middle of the street for the remainder of the morning. I had a hard time focusing because you only had to pass by the window and feel a sickness to your stomach. It wasn’t long before news spread, the young woman had passed.
I felt bad for all the people that must be affected by this, the guilt, despair and the long road to overcome such trauma and loss.

Again, it makes you think how quickly things can change or end. Appreciate everything you have now, don’t say or do something you may not be able to rectify later, there may be no later, there may be no next time.

My anxiety at the beginning of the week now seems silly and trivial. I really do feel stupid about it. I should relish in the challenges that come my way, it is part of living.



My deepest sympathies and thoughts go out to the victims of this accident.



JC Masterson, Silent River Kung Fu, Alberta, Canada

Maui

Still have 3 days left in Maui...water,whales and sunsets(whats a snow shovel?)
I hope I miss my flight home...

JC Masterson, Silent River Kung Fu, Alberta , Canada