Day 16 - Frustration Disappointment and Defeat

3 Kms this morning...came home beaten.
I made the decision to withdraw from the Death Race.

This is going to hang in the back of my mind now....

My hamstring pain has not subsided. I'm good for about 2km then it becomes unbearable. I walk for half a kilometer then I can go a little bit more. Massage, Active release, ice, stretching have all been good but it's going to take time...the race is in three weeks.

If it was just me, no problem, I would drag my dying body across the line but there are cut off times to meet and I would feel really crappy if I disqualified the team.

It leaves me wondering why? Why now? Trying to figure out what I did or didn't do.

I didn't injure myself, it just seemed to come on gradually. The Physio guy said sometimes repetitive training will expose injuries, scarred muscles or problem areas that we were not aware of. If that's true then I guess I can look at it as a good thing. My kicks on the left side have always been lacking and maybe this is why, so if I can fix the hamstring/abductor problem, I would be excited about improving those kicks.

I have to say the running has done wonders for my stamina, my sparring,rolling and overall cardio have improved noticeably. I have also enjoyed the alone time running has brought. I don't want to stop.

So , apart from feeling frustrated, having great anxiety over standing down or sucking it up ..not to mention I  have to swallow my pride and publicly announce my failing with embarrassment, the toughest part right now is to overcome the feeling of "doing nothing".  The feeling of defeat is powerful. It makes me want to stop running, actually stop training of any sort and just lay on the couch and feel sorry for myself.

I know that's how I feel today,

I'm hopeful later this week I will get my old mojo back and figure out how to fix this....till then...


Big Thanks to Sifu Darcy Regier for taking my spot!...I plan on being the best water boy/cheerleader ever for you guys!